WASHINGTON—A team of nine specially trained handlers have successfully lured outgoing vice president Dick Cheney into a reinforced steel traveling crate in order to transport him back to his permanent enclosure in Casper, WY, official sources reported Monday. "He's a smart one. Once he sees the crate, he gets pretty nippy, but we've learned a few tricks over the years," chief VP wrangler Ted Irving breathlessly said while applying pressure to a deep gash on his forearm. "If we break a rabbit's legs and throw it in there, he will eventually go in to finish it off. Doesn't work with dead rabbits, though. Cheney only eats what he kills." Irving said that the latest vice presidential relocation went much more smoothly than September's diplomatic trip to Georgia, which was delayed for several hours after Cheney mauled three secret service agents and escaped inside the White House walls.
http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/vice_presidential_handlers
GUANTÁNAMO BAY, Cuba — In one of its first actions, the Obama administration late Tuesday instructed military prosecutors to seek a 120-day halt of legal proceedings involving detainees at the Guantánamo Bay naval base — a clear break with the approach of the outgoing Bush administration.
The instruction came in a motion filed with a military court handling the case of five defendants accused of organizing the Sept. 11 attacks. The motion called for "a continuance of the proceedings" until May 20 so that "the newly inaugurated president and his administration (can) review the military commissions process, generally, and the cases currently pending before military commissions, specifically."
The same motion was filed in another case scheduled to resume today, involving a Canadian detainee, and will be filed in all other pending matters.
Such a request may not be automatically granted by military judges, and not all defense attorneys may agree to such a suspension. But the move is a first step toward closing a detention facility and system of military trials that became a worldwide symbol of the Bush administration's war on terror, and its unyielding attitude to foreign and domestic critics.
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2008651975_44orders21.html
They made a cover for the metal signage that looks pretty darn professional.
Someone tipped off NBCBayArea.com to the stunt just before sunrise on Inauguration Day.
At least four blocks of signs had been changed in the heart of the city's Financial District.
There were also chalk drawings on the ground pointing up to get pedestrians to notice the "change."
It's not clear how serious a crime this is or if police will bother to prosecute.
We assume crews will take them down at some point. People could get lost you know, this is a tourist town.
There is a rally that is expected to be held at Bush Street and Presidio later today –– where Bush Street officially stops with a little "end" sign on the street corner.
http://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/Bush-Street-Disappears-in-SF-Overnight.html
WASHINGTON -- Looking westward into the sun and speaking to more than 1 million people on the Mall in front of him and to millions more around the world, President Barack Obama delivered a tough inaugural speech that must have made members of the outgoing Bush administration squirm in their chairs.
After thanking President George W. Bush for his service to the nation and for helping during the presidential transition, Obama veered sharply, offering no attempt at sugar-coating, no deeper genuflection toward the Bushes, who left the Capitol by helicopter soon after Obama's blunt speech and headed for Texas.
Instead, Obama hit his theme early and often in his 18-minute address: The presidential inaugural oath is sometimes taken "amidst gathering clouds and raging storms." Now is one of those times, he said.
Obama declared "we are in the midst of crisis" and recounted wars, a badly weakened economy that he blamed on greed on the part of some and "also on our collective failure to make hard choices."
Homes have been lost, jobs shed, business shuttered, he recounted. Health care is too costly, schools fail too many students and we waste our energy.
There was no affable reference to Bush's eight years in office or mention of the wonders of the Bush legacy, nothing warm and fuzzy. It was a putdown, a repudiation of the Bush years.
Obama was just warming up.
Friends,
This happy, happy day!
We have made it through the Dark Ages and here we are, in one of the most redemptive moments history has ever witnessed. Barack Obama is our best hope to get it right, to heal our national soul, to reach out to the rest of the world with an olive branch instead of shocking brutality.
I want to take this opportunity to thank each and every one of you who has worked to make this day happen. For many, the madness goes back, not eight years but twenty-eight years, to the tragic day Reagan was sworn in to dismantle our precious "government of the people" and our beloved way of life.
To all of you who have spoken up and spoken out, who have written letters and marched for peace, for all of you who never gave up, you are the true heroes today. Many of you have suffered great economic losses. Some of you have endured a loved one being shipped overseas to senseless and shameful wars, and thousands of you have seen those loved ones returned home, no longer alive. It has been a heartbreaking time.
But the sun comes out at noon today. The disgraced outgoing president will slide out the side door and head to Crawford to sell the Hollywood set known as the Bush "ranch" before he settles down in an exclusive neighborhood in Dallas. I would encourage Mr. Bush to issue one final pardon before noon today -- his own. He had better issue a blanket pardon for all crimes that may have been committed since 2001 by himself, Cheney, Rumsfeld and the whole gang. Serious laws were broken, a war was concocted on a lie, and now, please, justice must be carried out.
So let us move forward and fix the horrible mess we are in. We are fortunate to have a new president who is smart and kind and committed to serving his country. Take a moment today and think about what you can do to join him in helping him do his job. We're all in this together. Our country has been so profoundly wrecked by an administration who decided to mug our constitution and then steal what they can for their Wall Street cronies on the way out the door.
According to D.C. officials, the jackhammering interrupted the landmark address on 30 separate occasions and came from the nearby U.S. Botanic Garden, where it was being used to break up pavement for a new Heroes of Horticulture exhibit.
"My fellow—," began Obama, who then stopped when he and the 2.5 million citizens present, some of whom had traveled thousands of miles to experience the once-in-a-lifetime event, were startled by loud, metal-on-concrete banging. "My fell…my fell…my—."
"Is that a jackhammer?" Obama added.
Though Obama first acknowledged the incessant jackhammering with an impromptu joke, saying, "Well, I know one guy who doesn't need a job," the typically poised orator grew gradually more annoyed as it became clear that the shrill thumping was not going to stop.
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/obama_inauguration_speech_ruined
A Nike print ad making the rounds on the Web this week is causing a stir for its homophobic copy, which reads, "The only thing worse than going to the ballet is going to the ballet to see your son."
But unlike previous ads that raised eyebrows among gays for their homophobic content -- à la that Snickers Super Bowl ad that featured two men appalled when they accidentally kiss after eating through the candy bar from opposite ends -- this ad wasn't commissioned by Nike.
In fact, Nike says the company didn't even know about the ad until it popped up on the Web.
The Nike ad in question ran in CMYK Magazine , a publication distributed quarterly to advertising and design professionals, as part of a quarterly student ad design competition.
Students Nicolas Schmidt-Fitzner and Tara Lawall created the mock-up under instructors Niklas Fing-Rupp and Jan Rexhausen. They attend one of the Miami Ad School's satellite locations in Hamburg, Germany.
The ad was selected by a "leading professional" in the advertising industry as one of the best ads submitted for the quarter. Student projects in areas of art direction,copywriting, design, illustration, and photography appear in each issue of the magazine.
Trying to explain what was wrong with the Bush Era feels like trying to vomit up a cannonball. I don't think my jaw can stretch that wide.
1. Dick Cheney — The worst Dick since Nixon. The man who shot his friend while in office. The "most powerful and controversial vice president." Until he got the job, people used to actually think it was a bad thing that the vice presidency has historically been a do-nothing position. Asked by PBS's Jim Lehrer about why people hate him, Cheney rejected the premise, saying, "I don't buy that." His top placement in our survey says otherwise.
2. Karl Rove — There wasn't a scandal in the Bush administration that Rove didn't have his fingerprints all over — see Plame, Iraq war deception, Gov. Don Siegelman, U.S. Attorney firings, missing e-mails, and more. As senior political adviser and later as deputy chief of staff, "The Architect" was responsible for politicizing nearly every agency of the federal government.
3. Alberto Gonzales — Fundamentally dishonest and woefully incompetent, Gonzales was involved in a series of scandals, first as White House counsel and then as Attorney General. Some of the most notable: pressuring a "feeble" and "barely articulate" Attorney General Ashcroft at his hospital bedside to sign off on Bush's illegal wiretapping program; approving waterboarding and other torture techniques to be used against detainees; and leading the firing of U.S. Attorneys deemed not sufficiently loyal to Bush.4. Donald Rumsfeld — After winning praise for leading the U.S. effort in ousting the Taliban from Afghanistan in 2001, the former Defense Secretary strongly advocated for the invasion of Iraq and then grossly misjudged and mishandled its aftermath. Rumsfeld is also responsible for authorizing the use of torture against terror detainees in U.S. custody; according to a bipartisan Senate report, Rumsfeld "conveyed the message that physical pressures and degradation were appropriate treatment for detainees."
5. Michael Brown — This former commissioner of the International Arabian Horse Association was appointed by Bush to head FEMA in 2003. After Katrina made landfall as a Category 4 hurricane, Brownie promptly did a "heck of a job" bungling the government's relief efforts, and was sent back to Washington a few days later. He was forced to resign shortly thereafter.
6. Paul Wolfowitz — As Deputy Secretary of Defense from 2001 to 2005, Wolfowitz was one of the primary architects of the
Iraq war, arguing for the invasion as early as Sept. 15, 2001. Testifying before Congress in February 2003, Wolfowitz said that it was "hard to conceive that it would take more forces to provide stability in post-SaddamIraq than it would take to conduct the war itself." Wolfowitz eventually admitted that "for bureaucratic reasons, we settled on one issue, weapons of mass destruction," as a justification for war, "because it was the one reason everyone [in the administration] could agree on."7. David Addington — "Cheney's Cheney" was the "most powerful man you've never heard of." As the leader of Bush's legal team and Cheney's chief of staff, Addington was the biggest proponent of some of Bush's most notorious legal abuses, such as torture and warrantless surveillance, and is a loyal follower of the so-called unitary executive theory.
8. Stephen Johnson — The "Alberto Gonzales of the environment," EPA Administrator Johnson subverted the agency's mission at the behest of the White House and corporate interests, suppressing staff recommendations on pesticides, mercury, lead paint, smog, and global warming.9. Douglas Feith — Undersecretary of Defense for Policy from 2001-2005, Feith headed up the notorious Office of Special Plans, an in-house Pentagon intelligence shop devised by Rumsfeld and Paul Wolfowitz to produce intelligence to justify the invasion of Iraq. A subsequent investigation by the Pentagon's Inspector General found the OSP's work produced "conclusions that were not fully supported by the available intelligence."
10. John Bolton — As Undersecretary of State, Bolton offered a strong voice in favor of invading Iraq and pushed for the U.S. to disengage from the International Criminal Court and key international arms control agreements. A recess appointment landed Bolton the job of U.S. ambassador to the United Nations, despite his stringent animosity toward the world body. Today, he spends his time calling for war with Iran.
Folk legend Pete Seeger (89) joined Bruce Springsteen at the conclusion of the "We Are One" concert at the Lincoln Memorial to lead a sing-along of Woody Guthrie's "This Land Is Your Land." Seeger, who rode the rails with Guthrie during the Great Depression, led the 500,000 person audience on the mall in singing the song as it was originally written - including verses often left out that address worker's rights.
'I would have to choose more conservatively, and maybe look for someone with a little less gristle, perhaps Sarah Palin.'
by R J Shulman
When asked by Hannity who would be at the top of his menu, Cheney said, "Michael Moore looks pretty juicy." But Cheney backtracked a bit. "If it is true that you are what you eat, I would have to choose more conservatively, and maybe look for someone with a little less gristle, perhaps Sarah Palin."
When a viewer called in and asked the vice president if killing and eating another human wasn't the most barbaric thing you could do, Cheney replied, "So?" Cheney then told Hannity, "They say you should keep your friends close and your enemies closer. What could be closer than having your enemies inside your gut?"
PACIFICA – For six years of war in Iraq, the Bush administration has done absolutely nothing to take care of the hundreds of thousands of wounded veterans coming home, said Aaron Glantz, a journalist who has been covering the stories of US military vets returning from Iraq and Afghanistan.
"We've had people brought into the VA, turned away, who have committed suicide after coming back from the war with post-traumatic stress disorder. We've had people redeployed to Iraq, even after they were diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder. We have 300,000 Iraq and Afghanistan war veterans coming home with traumatic brain injury, physical brain damage. We have 300,000 Iraq and Afghanistan war veterans who have filed disability claims with the federal government," Glantz told Democracy Now! on Thursday.
"In many cases, there is no medical services at all, because remember that many people serving in Iraq and Afghanistan come from rural communities where the VA doesn't even have a hospital," he explained.
There are 200,000 homeless war veterans in the United States.
"On every night, 200,000 people who have put on the uniform and served this country sleep homeless on the streets," said Glantz.
"Imagine that you come home from Iraq with post-traumatic stress disorder, a mental wound, or traumatic brain injury, physical brain damage often caused by a roadside bomb. The first thing that you have to do just to get in the door at the VA is to fill out a twenty-six-page form where you substantiate exactly how you were wounded, where you get letters of support from your battle buddies, from your commanders. You subpoena your own Army records, often with the help of your congressperson. And you present to the VA a gigantic claim folder, which they then sit on for an extended period of time. And that's just to get in the door. So we take our veterans when they're most wounded and most vulnerable and exploit them by making them fill out a mound of paperwork just to get in the door," noted Glantz.
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