Monday, April 6, 2009

Where Madoff's $55 billion went

Some things just didn't work out so well.

What did Bernie Madoff do with that $55 billion? Flip Side assigned its crack investigative reporting team to answer this question. The results are just in:

Bernard Madoff : Sources of Funds, 1992-2008

Chumps: $5,637,000,000. Shmedriks: $14,080,000,000. Dupes: $4,363,000,000. Shlemiels: $7,375,000,000. Goyim: $23,545,000. Total: $55,000,000,000.

Bernard Madoff: Uses of Funds, 1992-2008

New York Yankees baseball cap, $17.95

Loss on co-investment with Paul Allen in Charter Communications, $325,000,000

Book: Ponzi's Scheme: The True Story of a Financial Legend, $14.95

Ingrates who wanted money back: $4,325,000,000

NPR Spring Pledge Drive: $50

East Side Co-op: $4,000,000

Pilates classes: $1,325

Payment to Dr. Bomo Ngoro, Auditor General of Burkina: $18,766,000

Six Sigma Consulting: $919,459.15

Property in Antibes: $900,000

Loss on co-investment with Paul Allen in Portland Rose Garden: $55,000,000

Summer home in Hamptons: $1,580,000

Things that cost a lot of money: $3,695,000,000

Things that cost a whole lot of money: $9,423,000,000

Loss on co-investment with Paul Allen in Radar Networks: $35,780,000

NPR Feast of the Ascension Pledge Drive: $50

Purchase of Papal Indulgences: $2,936,890,000

Food (excluding Vitello Tonnato): $77,736.89

Vitello Tonnato: $77,736.89

Motivational speakers: Barry Bonds ($75,000), Jeff Skilling ($125,000), Charles Manson ($250,000)

Tchatchkes: $6,000,000,000

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